


Maybe...

by RandomlyGeneric



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Kara Danvers - Freeform, Lena Luthor - Freeform, SuperCorp, supergirl - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-14
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-10-04 22:50:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10292021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RandomlyGeneric/pseuds/RandomlyGeneric
Summary: Lena stares as Kara refuses to answer a simple question. "Did you kiss him back?"





	1. Chapter 1

She wanted to kiss her that morning she came in. Adjusting her glasses, nervous and fidgety. It was an impulse beyond her control. It surprised her this need to be close to this smiling being. Of course she discards this and moves on with her usual steel facade. 

It happened again while the reporter was talking. She forgets the subject too distracted with that mouth, those lips. Again it catches her off guard, but  she can't stop staring and wondering what if…

The next time it happens it is deliberate. She knows it's wrong but she can't have her so what's the harm in looking. Looks never killed anyone right? So she stares and she craves but she never reaches. 

Those lips haunt her, those blue eyes are demanding and yet uggg! She can't look away and she won't cross that line. 

The realization of her wants makes her so upset. her control is gone for an urge that won't yield. She is a Luthor for god's sake. Luthor’s done crave, they are desired upon! Luthor’s don’t dream, they are what others dream of becoming! And yet this unassuming reporter, with a sweet smile that makes her eyes crinkle, this woman that trips over her own words makes her chest tight every single time now.

This Danvers reporter is a beautiful painting meant to be admired but never touched, never owned, specially by someone with so much baggage like a Luthor. 

So when she hears her say his name it catches her off guard and it's like acid being poured directly to her stomach. The way she said he, HE kissed her! How dare HE, how did HE dare cross that line! 

“Did you kiss him back?” 

The question spills out of her without permission, only saved by years of schooling her face to a blank canvas. Kara looks at her for what feels hours. The air thickens and the lack of answer is all Lena needs to realize what this means. She lost a battle she never fought. This boy, this undeserving joke gets to touch her! And Kara just continues to stare. 

Her insides burn with anger and regret, so she stands and walks away. A drink that’s her excuse. Something strong to calm her breathing, she needs Kara to leave, she needs her gone now or she won't be able to be a friend anymore. She needs her gone or she will break with anger and will lose her only friend with her abrasive words threatening to come out. 

“Kara, I hate to cut this short but I have a meeting and I need to prepare.”

Her voice carries a sharp edge that reminds her of her mother, the way she enunciates and truncates words. She is Luthor control and grit run in her family, but they are close to slipping because the unattainable has been solidified. Lena knows she never had a chance, but the small dream that allowed her to crave is gone. Her ribs feel like they are caving in and yet she calmly fills her glass with two ice cubes and a splash of hard hot alcohol goes in next.

Kara is still staring at her when she turns, still an unanswered question floating in the air that keeps thickening. Until she breaks and stares at the floor then somewhere out the window. 

“Kara, I wish you happiness but I must really prepare, perhaps…”

“No, I didn’t”

And just like that she freezes, her pulse growing in hear ears. She stares at Kara as she stumbles on her thoughts. 

“I didn’t kiss him back. He is not the one I want kissing me. But you are busy and preparing for a call. I should go.”

Her words thrown back at her. A pause then Kara begins collecting her belongings, clumsier hands moving fast with lack of rhythm gathering whatever is around her. Lena is mute, paralyzed and unable to react. 

She is still frozen when Kara stands, collects herself and moves, her hand on the door and Lena is still a statue, her anger replaced with confusion and an inability to react. 

“Who then?” 

The question rushes out of her before the reporter leaves along with her heart. Kara just turns and with a shy smile she just looks, and continues to looks at her while Lena is breaking and rebuilding in the spot in a constant loop. She can't mean her? Lena? Can she dream to have her, is there a chance for her? Just a few second ago she was ready to set her office in fire with anger, now she is floating in confusion and hope.

“Well, I thought I may have a chance with a friend, but she perhaps is not ready, or may not want me. I don’t know. I am not the same as her, she is so much and I am, well it's complicated, so I was not sure but I really should go now because you are busy and I am late.”

And like that Kara is gone, leaving Lena to stand still frozen unable to react. She wanted to kiss her but her whole body betrayed her. She wanted to speak, to move to her, to do something, anything at all! But she just stood there, with the same hot drink in her hand and lead in her veins.

She swallows the drink in one pull, and that’s all it takes to spring her whole self into action.

“Jess cancel my next appointments, there is a personal matter I need to attend.”

Next time she sees her reporter, she is going to kiss her.

  
  



	2. Maybe... Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Same conversation. The reason Kara cant find her voice to answer Lenas questions.

How strange it is to hold so much power, so much control in just one finger. She could start wars, bend powerful men to her will, crush them before her morning coffee but all she wanted, all she craved was her. This woman with pale skin and hair as black as the empty night. Lena with eyes the color of earth and tree tops. This enchantress that kidnapped her thoughts and scrambled her stomach.

As a super she could harvest the power of the sun and offer her the world, but as Kara, she was left bare, simplified and vulnerable. So she struggled to become articulate and elegant as Lena was. Feeble attempt she soon realized when her hands betrayed her, tangling and untangling themselves. Her tongue followed as she failed to voice any coherent thought. What was happening? When did she lose control? This woman had captured her and she was the most willing of victims.

As Kara, she could only observe from afar, imagining and dream what it could be. So she hid her heart and offer her friendship instead. Maybe one day she would be courageous just like Lena was and dare to ask for something more. But for now all she wanted was to make those sad eyes smile, and she would trade her heart over and over to make that happen.

But then he kissed her and made demands and assertions. People told her he would make sense, they together made sense, but she already knew the answer and he was never part of it. Would never be part of her!

So she visited Lena, she was her ground and it didn't matter another sad excuse because right now all she needed was her. Just a few minutes to see that smile and those eyes to give her strength again. But instead of that idle conversation she had in mind, she confessed.

“He kissed me.”

And just like that the air stopped, it happened in an instant. Lena’s soft smile crumbled replaced by ice. Kara saw her swallow, heard her heart pick up. Why did she do that? Why did those words escape her mouth?! 

“Did you kiss him back?”

What? Who? Him? No, of course not why would she? Her lungs are filling with dread and her mind is not working! Those green eyes were piercing right through her, scared and demanding. What was Kara going to say, that she wanted Lena to kiss her instead? How could she? She would lose her in an instant! 

“Kara, I hate to cut this short but I have a meeting and I need to prepare.”

Lena’s breath was slow, controlled as she filled her glass. Kara didn't even realized Lena had moved away. She was staring, trying to come up with an answer, any answer that would prevent the truth from escaping. An answer that didn't mean she had lost it all. Why did she had to be so inarticulate, why couldn't she be more like her Lena right now and say beautiful words like she did?

“Kara, I wish you happiness but I must really prepare, perhaps…”

Happiness? With him? This is when she knows she failed. Those words meant to end it all, her time is up. Lena thinks there is someone else making her happy. Not that it matter, Lena is unattainable way beyond her reach and yet the thought of Lena thinking that is suffocating her.

“No, I didn’t”

Her words are small and sound breathy and desperate.

“I didn’t kiss him back. He is not the one I want kissing me. But you are busy and preparing for a call. I should go.”

If she she doesn't leave now, Lena will see her lip tremble and her sad attempt to compose herself quickly failing. She is losing Lena all because her mouth conspired with her heart and decided to confess. 

This feel monumental. She knows Lena has never given her false hope, she offered her friendship and Kara is betraying her by having feelings for her. She has to leave now, she is about to break and Lena is the last person she wants witness of her failure.

“Who then?”

If Kara could only tell her. If he could only be as brave as Lena is and tell her how she wishes it was her, how since the first time she saw Lena all she has wanted is her. But she is not brave or brazen as Lena is. So she comes up with a half truth instead.

“Well, I thought I may have a chance with a friend, but she perhaps is not ready, or may not want me. I don’t know. I am not the same as her, she is so much and I am, well it's complicated, so I was not sure but I really should go now because you are busy and I am late.”

Lena never moved, her stare never wavered, her drink in her hand solid and composed. What a contrast of the mess Kara was. Her vision starts blurring when she closes the door. Grateful for the space and distance, she is going to break and the last person she wants witness is Lena. So she flies to the skies where she can be alone with her thoughts. When she can pretend that today didn't happen, that she has not lost Lena and her heart is still whole.

**Author's Note:**

> I tried something a little longer. I am sure Kara can tell how nervous, angry and defeated Lena feels, but perhaps she is just as confused as Lena. Thank you for reading
> 
> I am on Tumblr as RandomlyGeneric if you want to say hi :)


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